Do vagina's smell?
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Randomize
