I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize