I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
