I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
the room spins SO much faster in panama
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
