so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
where does the pee come out of this thing
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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