I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
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