Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
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