yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
