Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
