She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
