He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
