I wannas sexs uuuuu
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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