They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Randomize
