so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
I checked into jail on foursquare
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
It's never too late to be topless.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
