would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
