Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
