yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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