So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
