there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
