Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
You're my little dorito
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Randomize
