I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
