butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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