Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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