Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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