Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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