So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
