last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
We were destined to go to rehab together
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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