i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Randomize
