Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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