did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Randomize
