It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Randomize
