I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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