that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
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