So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
