Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
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