oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Randomize
