He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
Randomize
