Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Randomize
