Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
where are my eyebrows?
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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