I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
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