i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Randomize
