Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Randomize
