bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize