STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Randomize
