so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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