so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
