I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
