i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Please don't give away my fajitas
Randomize
