There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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