Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
