I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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